Sarcasm in the Workplace

It is actually a thanksgiving letter as the year 2015 ended, I thought I would better write a thanksgiving letter on behalf of a poor Afghan refugee who was once working in a European country as his first work experience in Europe. So here it begins …

In the first week of the work you expect some people to say welcome and introduce the workplace for you, but instead in the first week of the work a black racist lady whose main central ideology and the only thing which matters for her is the “color of the skin” of the people; comes and says in a very bad accent:

• “Your country produces opium”.
• Yes Madam, it does produce some amount but not as much as you hear by the media. In the media it is exaggerated. By the other hand, opium has different uses, it can be used to produce heroin, and it can also be used to produce medicine. If you get some opium from Afghanistan, make sure that you don’t use it as heroin, because it will kill you, use it as medicine instead so that it can save some lives.
• No, no, no … opium is a bad thing …
• Well, it is not as bad as guns, because guns only kill people, guns can’t be used as medicines … producing opium is the same thing as producing a knife … you can kill yourself with a knife and also you can use it in the kitchen to cook food … the option is yours … what you are going to do with it, that is very important …
• The very next day the other instructor calls the Afghan refugee as a “tourist” but that is not what he means, what he means is a terrorist which rhymes with the tourist and the other colleagues explains that further “tourist” or terrorist” and then they all laugh … the Afghan refugee looks at them and keeps quiet and says nothing back to avoid fights and also because of the famous Afghan proverb which says that “Jawab-e- ablahaan khaamoshist” which means “Silence is the best answer to stupid people” …
• The next day some colleagues call the Afghan refugee “Taliban” and they think it is funny and a good thing to say … some other learnt to say that too …
• The Afghan refugee looks at them and smiles and says do you know what that the Taliban means? And do you know what kind of people they are? I think you have no idea what you are saying … they never come to Europe to look for asylum because they think that European countries are enemies of all Taliban. I think they know European countries much better than those who think that European people are nice and they will save Afghan refugees ..   
• Some other refugee colleagues from other countries ask Afghan refugee “Why don’t you Muslims all go to Saudi Arabia that you all come here in Europe?”
• How come you are a refugee too and say something like that? What makes you better than the Afghan refugee? Is it because you are a Christian refugee and the Afghan refugee is a Muslim refugee? Shame on you with this kind of mentality.
• When they evaluate your work, they say all lies about you and they try their best to underestimate what you are doing … they try to accuse you of the being what you are not … they call you lazy … they tell you that you don’t work properly … all what you have to do is to keep silent and say “Yes sir” you are right …
• Never try to reason back or never say something back, otherwise they get angry and they create lots of extra work for you and make different kinds of problem for you …
• It is a very different and interesting working culture that you have to adopt to it and you have to learn how to cope with it …
• You need to learn to laugh at people who say bad words to you … who might call you terrorist but you have to laugh or try to smile even though if you are angry at the highest level … this is called compromise with the new work environment …
• They may ask someone to steal from your workplace to blame you for stealing, so you have to be very careful …
• They may call you a thief while you have not stolen a single piece of thing  … you have to learn to deal with it and say that you are not a thief, you can’t shout or you can’t get angry because you will be fired, the only way to react is that you have to say politely “Sorry, it is a misunderstanding, I am not a thief and I have not stolen anything”
• They might also blame you for having an affair with a colleague, and you have to learn to say in a nice manner that “Sir, what you think is totally wrong”. I have got no affairs here in the working place …
• You are actually dealing with a number of psychos who hate you for no reason and you have to learn to manage all these issues so that you have a minor physical job to be able to pay your bills.
• This is the real situation of the refugees of Afghanistan in Europe. 

معرفی علوم سیاسی سازنده برای افغانستان

An interview with an Afghan child about Christmas or birthday of Jesus the Christ

مصاحبه ای با یک کودک افغانستان در مورد کریسمس یا جشن تولد حضرت عیسی مسیح

تاریخ 25 دسمبر همه ساله مصادف است با جشن با سعادت و پرشکوه تولد حضرت عیسی مسیح که این روز را بر تمام پیروان دین و آئین حضرت عیسی مسیح تبریک و تهنیت عرض میکنم. درست 2016 سال قبل از امروز زیر درختی که امروز به نام درخت کریسمس مشهور است، کودکی به دنیا آمد که اسمش عیسی بود. اما پس از آنکه مرده ها را زنده ساخت به لقب مسیحا مسمی شد که به معنی حیات بخش است. او میخواست تمام انسان های روی زمین در صلح، آرامش و امنیت با همزیستی مسالمت آمیز کنار هم زندگی کنند. حضرت عیسی مسیح یک پیام صلح و آرامش برای مردم دنیا داشت. حضرت عیسی مسیح را در افغانستان نیز مردمی که مسلمان اند از روی زندگینامه او که در قران شریف ذکر شده است، به نام پیامبر خدا می شناسند. مردم افغانستان درست همان مقام، احترام و جایگاهی را برای عیسی مسیح قایل هستند که برای حضرت محمد پیامبر اسلام قایل اند.

در کشور هایی که دین و آئین آنها مسیحی است، متاسفانه تفاوت بسیار زیاد میان حضرت عیسی و پیروانش وجود دارد. امیدواریم که با یادبود از تولد حضرت عیسی، پیروان حضرت عیسی کوشش کنند که فاصله بوجود آمده میان آنها و حضرت عیسی را کمتر سازند و امیدواریم که پیروان حضرت عیسی نیز به صفت هایی مانند خود او یاد شوند.

در روز های جشن تولد حضرت عیسی که به نام کریسمس هم یاد میشود، شخصی با لباس سرخ در خانه ها میاید و به کودکان تحفه میدهد. ما درین زمینه خواستیم از یک کودک افغانستان بپرسیم که او از پیروان حضرت عیسی درین روز چه چیز هایی توقع دارد و از آنها چه چیز هایی را میخواهد.

سوال را اینگونه مطرح کردیم که اگر سینت نیکولاس که اسم همان مرد مقدس مسیحی است، به خانه تو بیاید و به تو بگوید که از ما چه میخواهی، آرزو هایی تو منحیث یک کودک از او چیست؟

1. من از تمام پیروان حضرت عیسی میخواهم که در کشور ما افغانستان جنگ را متوقف کنند. من از آنها میخواهم که ما را بگذارند به مکتب بروئیم و درس بخوانیم.
2. از تمام پیروان حضرت عیسی میخواهیم که گروه های تندرو مثل طالبان را حمایت نکنند و به بهانه حمله به آنها به کشور های ما حمله نظامی نکنند. ما نمی خواهیم در جنگ بمیریم.
3. از تمام پیروان حضرت عیسی میخواهیم که مانند حضرت عیسی به مردم مسلمان مهربان باشند. برنامه ها و تیاتر های ضد مسلمانی را متوقف کنند و بیشتر از این نام مسلمان ها را در رسانه های شان بد نکنند. من از آنها میخواهم که در برنامه های تلویزیونی شان، اسم آدم بدک ها را اسم های مسلمانی نگذارند. ما به شما و به دین شما و به حضرت عیسی احترام داریم و اما نظر شما در مورد ما کودکان مسلمان بسیار منفی است. ما آنگونه بد نیستیم که شما فکر میکنید. ما آنگونه بد نیستیم که شما در برنامه های تان ما را نشان میدهید.
4.  شما در تمام جهان ما را به نام تروریست معرفی میکنید، لطفاً این کار را نکنید. ما به هیچ کسی ضرر نرساندیم و به هیچ کسی ضرر نخواهیم رسانید.
5. ما از پیروان حضرت عیسی میخواهیم که ما را در حملات یازدهم سپتمبر شریک ندانند. ما مردم امریکا و تمام پیروان حضرت عیسی و حضرت موسی را دوست داریم و به تمام ادیان دیگر احترام میگذاریم.
6.  ما میخواهیم در صلح زندگی کنیم. ما از جنگ خسته شدیم. ما نمیخواهیم به افغانستان اسلحه بفرستید. ما از شما میخواهیم که به افغانستان قلم و کتابچه بفرستید.
7.  اگر میخواهید ما کودکان افغانستان را حمایت کنید، به ما مکتب بسازید. به ما آب آشامیدنی بدهید. به ما برق بدهید. به ما دولت بسازید. به ما اقتصاد بسازید. ما را یاد بدهید که چگونه کشور خود را آباد کنیم. به ما درس محبت بیاموزید.
8.  شما خودتان نیز مثل حضرت عیسی مهربان باشید. به بهانه های مختلف به کشور های اسلامی مثل افغانستان و عراق حمله نکنید. آنها هم مثل شما انسان اند. آنها نباید سرکوب و یا کشته شوند.
9.  به کشور هایی که گروه های تروریستی را حمایت میکنند، پول ندهید. شما به پاکستان پول میدهید، پاکستان از آن پول طالبان را حمایت میکند و آنها ما را میکشند و مکتب های ما را میسوزانند. لطفاً از حمایت گروه های تروریستی و از حمایت حامیان آنها دست بکشید.
10. حضرت عیسی به همه مردم مهربان بود چه از او پیروی میکردند و چه پیروی نمی کردند و به ادیان دیگر باور داشتند. پیروان او نیز باید همینگونه باشند. پیروان حضرت عیسی باید شرایط همزیستی مسالمت آمیز را در میان فرهنگ های متفاوت گسترش بدهند. از جنگ و خشونت و حمله به کشور های دیگر در سال جدید میلادی باید پرهیز کنند.
11.  ما کودکان افغانستان باور داریم که ما میتوانیم با برادران و خواهران عیسوی خود یکجا درین کره خاکی به شکل مسالمت آمیز، با باور های متفاوت زندگی کنیم. بدون اینکه به اسلحه نیاز باشد.

خلاصه اینکه 5 روز بعد از جشن تولد حضرت عیسی مسیح، که پیامبر مسلمانان نیز است، سال جدید میلادی 2016 آغاز میشود و ما کودکان افغانستان از صمیم قلب این روز را به تمام پیروان حضرت عیسی و تمام عساکر ناتو و امریکا که در افغانستان حضور دارند، تبریک و تهنیت گفته و آورز میکنیم که سال 2016 یک سال پر از صلح و صفا در افغانستان باشد و درین سال تعداد کودکان که در جنگ کشته میشوند کمتر شود و همچنان آروز میکنیم که هیچ سرباز مسیحی در افغانستان کشته نشود و هیچ کسی درین کشور مرمی و یا راکت فیر نکند و هیچ بمباران در هیچ یک از مناطق افغانستان صورت نگیرد و تمام سوء تفاهم ها میان مردم افغانستان و جامعه جهانی نیز بر طرف شود.

افغانستان قربانی تروریسم است و امید ما به سوی کمک مردم جهان برای نجات از تروریسم است. تروریسم در افغانستان همه روزه قربانی میگیرد و هیچ کسی نمیتواند مردمی را که درین کشور اسیر تروریسم شده است را نجات بدهد. ما امیدواریم درین کشور به کودکان بیشتر ازین آسیبی نرسد. ما امیدواریم که دیگر فرخنده ها، رخشانه ها، تبسم ها، و مردم بی گناه قربانی این سوء تفاهم ها نشود و پاکستان نیز از حمایت تروریسم در افغانستان دست بردارد.

ما امیدواریم که دولت افغانستان نیز مسئولانه حفظ جان کودکان را در اولویت برنامه های کاری خود قرار دهد.

سال جدید میلادی و جشن تولد حضرت عیسی مسیح به تمام پیروان دین و آئین حضرت عیسی مسیح مبارک باد و ما کودکان افغانستان "یک افغانستان آرام، امن و بدون جنگ"را از سینت نیکولاس تقاضا داریم.

An interview with an Afghan child about Christmas or birthday of Jesus the Christ

On 25 December every year coincides with the celebration of the birthday of Jesus Christ with happiness and glory to this day for the followers of this faith and religion, the mission of the Jesus Christ in the center of all, I congratulate this happy day to all followers of Jesus and his way. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Just 2016 years ago under a tree today known as the Christmas tree, a child named Jesus was born. But after he gave life to the dead, he was entitled as the Messiah which means life giver. He wanted all people on earth to live in peace and security and the peaceful coexistence was the core of his mission. Jesus Christ was a message of peace to people around the world. The Muslim people of Afghanistan know Jesus Christ from his biography discussed in detail in the Holy Koran, where he is known as the Prophet of God in the Muslim community and the people of Afghanistan respect him the same as Prophet Mohammad and give him the same position, place and respect.

In countries where the Christian faith is dominant, unfortunately, there is a very much difference there between Jesus and his followers. We hope that by commemorating the birth of Jesus, the gap and difference between Jesus and his mission and what currently his followers are doing should be decreased.

In the Christian countries, the birthday of Jesus is known as Christmas day and this splendid ceremony is accompanied by Saint Nikolas (Santa Claus) culture in which a person comes home with red clothes and gifts for the children to make them happy.

In this context we interview a child from Afghanistan to see what he wishes from Santa Claus.

We ask the question this way, if Santa Claus, or a very strong Christian man who can do anything, would come to your door and ask your wishes, what would be your wishes from him:

1. I respect and urge all followers of Jesus the Christ; I want them to stop the war in Afghanistan. I want them to let us to school and study.
2. I request all the followers of the Jesus not to support Extremist groups like the Taliban as a means to use them as an excuse to attack our country. We do not want to die in the war.
3. I request all the followers of the Jesus, to be like Jesus, be merciful and kind to the Muslim people. I also request them to stop anti-Muslim programs and theaters and to stop defaming Muslims in their respective media. We are not that bad as those Medias say. I request them not to choose a Muslim name in their TV programs, for the names of the bad characters. We respect you and your religion and we respect Jesus, but what you think about us as Muslim children, it is very negative, you have a very bad picture in your minds about us. We're not as bad as you think we are. We're not as bad as you're showing us in your programs and Medias.
4. You call us terrorists all over the world; please do not do this. We have never harmed anyone and we will not harm anyone in future.
5. We request all are followers of Jesus not to relate us to the attacks of September eleventh. We love the people of America and all the followers of Jesus and Moses and we love and respect all other religions.
6. We want to live in peace. We are tired of war. We do not want you to send weapons to Afghanistan. We ask you to send to Afghanistan notebooks and pens instead.
7. If you want to support the Afghan children, build for us our own schools. Provide us some drinking water. Help us to generate electricity for our village. Help us have a good government. Help us make our economy so that parents would not be forced to sell their children in this country. Teach us how to build and develop our country. Teach us some love lessons.
8. Be kind like Jesus. Make no various excuses to attack Muslim countries like Afghanistan and Iraq. They are all full of humans just like you. They should not be suppressed or killed.
9. Do not help and support the countries that support terrorist groups, do not give money to them to support terrorists further. You pay to Pakistan, Pakistan is supporting the Taliban with that money and they kill us and burn our schools. Please stop supporting terrorist groups and stop supporting their supporters.
10. Jesus was kind to all people whether they followed him or not, whether they believed him or believed in other religions. His followers must also be the same. The followers of Jesus must develop a culture of peaceful co-existence among different cultures. They should avoid further war and violence and attacks on other countries in the New Year 2016.
11. We believe that the children of Afghanistan can live peacefully with their Christian brothers and sisters on this planet together, with different beliefs we can co-exist and live. Without the guns needed.

In just 5 days after the celebration of the birthday of Jesus Christ, who is the prophet of Muslims too, the new year of 2016 will begin and we, the children of Afghanistan from the heart congratulate this day to all the followers of Jesus and all NATO troops in Afghanistan and US soldiers in Afghanistan, congratulations! And we hope that new year 2016 will be a year of peace in Afghanistan and in this year the number of children killed in the war will decrease and we continue to hope that there would be not any Christian soldier killed in Afghanistan anymore and no one in this country will fire rockets, grenades and no more bombing of Afghanistan villages by any means. I hope that all misunderstandings among the people of Afghanistan and the international community should be solved.

Afghanistan is a victim of terrorism and we hope to help people to save the world from terrorism. Every day, there is a child victim of terrorism in Afghanistan and the children get murdered and nobody can save them in this country, this country is captured by terrorism. We hope no more terrorism harm the children in this country. We hope that we, the children of Afghanistan are all happy. I hope we had here today Rukhshana alive, Tabassom alive, Shukorya alive and they were all smiling, and all the innocent victims were alive today. I hope that the misunderstandings between Afghanistan and Pakistan would be solved and Pakistan would stop supporting terrorism in Afghanistan.

We hope that the Afghan government would become more responsible to protect the lives of children in Afghanistan and make this as a priority on their agenda.

Once again I congratulate the New Year and the birth of Jesus Christ to all people who follow Jesus Christ and we the children ask Santa Claus a “A safe Afghanistan without wars’.